done4good asked two questions:
Q1.: Why is it every time this is discussed, people take either extreme?
A1.: Because that is how conversations work. If everyone thought the same, no discussion board would be necessary; see the invisible discussion board at JW.ORG as an example.
Q2.: Neither extreme is correct. [?]
A2.: According to Schrödinger's Witnesses, this is not only correct, but necessary.